Inner Selfie Sunday: The Search for Perfection

Perfect body, perfect attitude, perfect house, perfect life, perfect children, perfect spouse, perfect, perfect, perfect…? What is perfection and who is searching for it?

My daughter has been watching a cartoon and all the females on the show have tiny waists, are curvaceous, and have perfectly symmetrical faces. I wonder whether she sees this and understands it. I worry that it will affect her self-esteem and her self-image. Does it make an impact on her? How does seeing these types of women make me feel? I have 3 beautiful children. They are healthy, happy, and perfect at least in my eyes. As a woman I know the desire that fuels us to be skinnier with a large bust and derrière. It is an unrealistic goal for most of us who are not born perfectly proportioned in the first place but we are all searching for that semblance of our own perfect body. I had 3 kids. I have more children than any of my friends and I am now in my thirties. Considering all that information I am in relatively great shape but I could always be “better”. What is better? I could never get down to a size 2 waist but hey, I will never know unless I give it a shot, right?

Men are blamed for demeaning and sexualizing women but we can do it to ourselves just as easily. The media is a broad spectrum entity that fills our every second of our every day. Let’s see what IS the media? Well, there is Facebook, Instagram, WordPress, Twitter, Television Shows, Movies, News, Radio, Magazines, Newspapers, Books, Commercials, infomercials, Billboards, Mail, Telephones, and so much more. Media is any way that we can communicate with one another. Wow, let’s repeat that… ANY WAY THAT WE CAN COMMUNICATE WITH ONE ANOTHER. That means that media is everything that we see, hear, and speak at any point in time. So how can we blame the media when it is essentially everywhere? How can we change it and change our ideals of what a perfect body is or isn’t?

There is this need to be the best within us all. We all struggle to overcome ourselves and we all put on these appearances in front of others as well. Facebook and Twitter and all social media displays the very best of us as well as the worst at times. For the most part though we push the positive and withhold the negative sides of ourselves. As a mother I know the stares and looks of other mothers as we judge one another. There is a secret/hidden competition between us all to make sure that “our” children have the best childhood. This includes arts and crafts, limited discipline, miraculously well-behaved children, constant excursions, little to no television, impeccable grades, well-kempt hair and clothing, and anything else that is the new child-rearing fad at the time. There is a never-ending sense that you are failing at keeping up as a parent. I was recently told that my children were “scared of me” because they had such wonderful behavior and that must be the only reason they do. Obviously if my kids are well-behaved I must be doing something wrong. You can almost never win for losing.

As a spouse we are supposed to project this image of perfection as well. We don’t want others to know that our marriage or relationship is flawed. Divorce or going through a break-up is an admission of imperfection. Await the judging people! There is NO perfect relationship. There are good ones and those are ones that people work very hard to maintain. Give yourself 10 years with a person and you will find that it isn’t ever going to be as easy as it was that first year. Real life has a way of making things real. With your perfect relationship make sure you throw in that perfect 4 bedroom, 2 1/2 bath house, those magazine cover children, that fitness body, and the best attitude that money could never buy.

After all of these I am a little confused I must say. Let’s see I need a perfectly lean and curvaceous body that I will need to work on daily. I need to have a beautiful and expensive house that is always spotless. I must also have a high paying career that others will be envious of, go ahead and throw in lots of money too. I have perfect children who adore me. My spouse is Angelic and built like a Greek God, and NOW I also need to be a wonderful person who others LOVE. Who has time for all of that? Not to mention that with all of that self-seeking behavior how am I suppose to also put others’ well-being ahead of my own? Whew. I must say that another P word pops into my head when I consider all of these Perfect things that I am supposed to have…pretend. How can anyone possibly have and do everything and be truly happy? Perhaps there are a few out there but for the most part we are Normal people living normal lives. We have catastrophes everyday and we deal and move on as best we can. We fight, we eat, we diet, we make-up, we discipline, we teach, we love, we cry, we err, we smile, and we continue.

The search for perfection will never die and as society delves deeper into the lands of science and technology new genres that need perfection will present themselves to us all. I guess that my take and my thoughts on perfection are that we should all just search for what makes us Happy and what is more perfect than Happy?

One thought on “Inner Selfie Sunday: The Search for Perfection

  1. Pingback: He Said, She Said: Bloggers Edition. | Manuscript. Head. Drawer.


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