Acceptance, Blog, Depression, Help, hope, Love, mental health, podcast, public speaker, Relationships, Strength, susie reece, Susie Reynolds, susie reynolds reece, Thoughts, Understanding

WiseHealth for Women Radio: Grief Series: Episode 1

“Life is precious, and so is saying goodbye.” -Linda Kreter

Grief is the longest, most painful goodbye. It’s awful, one-sided, awkward, and agonizing. Just when you think you have let go of their hand, a reminder, memory, or image flashes before your heart and takes you back to where they once were. Sometimes they gently touch you and you drift back into their presence. Other times they knock you right on your ass and you realize they are gone. Gone. And now they are nothing more than a _ space where their name should be.

We take so much for granted. I have taken far too many for granted. Now I can only ever look backward on many of those I have loved. I can only remember them. I am left longing for more of them. More time, more moments, more laughter, more meaning… just more.

I say this, to remind you to pause. Right now, stop what you are doing… stop reading this and text someone. That someone. The one who flashes to your mind in this very moment. Stop reading and take 4 seconds to say, “hey, I love you.” Make a plan to see them. Make them a priority for just a few seconds of the 86,400 seconds you have today.

We don’t pause often enough anymore. We don’t pause and consider the things we are posting, the content we are sharing, or the person standing right in front of us begging to be seen. I ask you to take a moment, every so often to be intentional. Take a moment to invest in those you care about and take a moment to renew your heart. Because life is precious. Life is short. Life is difficult and cruel. But we can make life worth living, if we love the living.

I have been blessed in this life to be allowed to share my perspective and thoughts on my world. And I would personally like to thank Linda for having me back on her podcast and for allowing me a chance to share my thoughts and experiences. I’m not sure that I know a lot of things in life, but I do know that life is short. I have learned that lesson in too many ways over my lifetime.

This series is for those I’ve loved, those who have left their mark on me, and those we’ve lost far too soon, my father, Andrew T., Brittany W., my grandmother who adopted this little Korean, Courtney Sorrells- the best friend I can never replace, Katrina- my sister and unapologetic woman (man how I wish I was more fearlessly myself like she was), Second, Olivia- there are no words.

And every person we’ve lost to suicide and substances over the years, sadly there are far too many to name.

If you find yourself commuting, driving, waiting in an office, or have a few free moments, please check out the first podcast episode of a series on grief.

Linda Kreter and Susie Reece bring you the first in our series about Grief and Loss. We want to start the conversation, and let you know you’re not alone in this altogether human experience.

Please like the WiseHealth for Women Radio page and share this podcast episode.

Grief and Loss Series – Episode 1

For more information about Susie Reece, go to http://www.SusieReece.org or Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/southernfriedasian/. For more information about Linda Kreter, go to http://www.WiseHealth.com.

Standard
Acceptance, Children, Choices, Depression, Fear, Help, hope, Love, mental health, public speaker, Relationships, Strength, Suicide, suicide prevention, Understanding

Bullying a Blinding Issue

Navigating the worlds of suicide prevention can be difficult. It’s definitely a delicate balance when it comes to the many ways people want to be engaged and represented in their individual journeys.

There are some things we have learned through experience, through education, and through the expertise of others. But there are also some very simple beliefs we hold dear to our hearts. Beliefs like, not everyone will always like you, but we can still do our best to be kind. We believe boundaries are part of a healthy self-care regimen. These include the types of people we engage and interact with in our lives. Boundaries that protect our wellbeing. Boundaries that set standards for our safety and the safety of others.

Safety and security are of the utmost importance. We want you all to be safe. To be happy and healthy. But we know we all encounter people who are in pain from time to time. Sometimes their pain spills over into the world around them. It isn’t fair. It isn’t easy. But it happens.

The thing is, we don’t always know what is going on in a person’s life. We don’t always know the tragedies or traumas a person has experienced. These traumas affect us, often deeply. They can alter our ability to be compassionate, to be aware of our impact on others, to be kind. We can hurt others and in that hurt, we can feel less alone.

How terrible, that a person can be in so much pain, that the act of hurting another can lead them to feel less alone.

Nothing in this world is simple. We don’t have all the answers and we don’t know the whole story but we do know, pain magnifies pain. Pain begets pain when allowed to go unaddressed.

Our approach to bullying is this, people are hurting. We do not condone physical violence. We do not agree with emotional, mental, verbal abuse. We do not believe in name calling or pointing fingers.

We believe these behaviors are symptoms of a much larger issue. When it comes to youth and children, we especially believe WE are the adults. It is our role to pause with them, see them, offer support, educate, help them through their pain, and never limit them with so simple and blind a phrase as “Bullying is for Losers.”

Everyday children are hurting. Everyday they are told they will never, are not, cannot… let’s change the way we communicate.

It won’t be quick or easy but in the end, if we put the work in…. we could change so many worlds.

Standard
Acceptance, Beauty, Depression, Dreams, Fear, Help, hope, Love, mental health, public speaker, Relationships, Strength, susie reece, Susie Reynolds, susie reynolds reece, Thoughts, Writing

I’m Sorry.

I’m sorry.

I struggle with these words to this day.

Not because I can’t say them when they are merited. Not because they can’t be felt deeply in every cavernous crevice of my spirit. But because they were my cage for so long.

I remember being clumsily coerced to apologize to those who ridiculed and hated me. I was compelled to apologize to those who had false impressions of who I was because they never took the time to get to know me. I recall being commanded that I needed to accommodate the feelings of everyone else and continually disregard my own for their sake. Because they mattered.

I’m sorry was my apology for existing. I’m sorry was how I begged to be overlooked so as not to intimidate or unintentionally make anyone feel less than me. I’m sorry was my forced anonymity in a world that erases those who don’t stand up for themselves.

You thought I looked at you harshly. You felt I was judging you.

You felt intimidated by my being a person, no matter how small a person I was.

Why should I be sorry for any of those?

Don’t be a person. Don’t be me. Don’t be. Be sorry. Be less. Be invisible. Because you are sorry and nothing more. You sorry little nothing.

These words choked me into the fetal position and urged me to be unconceived. Because this habit wound its way into my vernacular and decided it belonged. It slipped seamlessly from my tongue time after time. Often still, I say those words before I realize they have been said. To this day, I find myself apologizing for my existence. I find myself asking for forgiveness for my being. For who I am. Allowing others to lessen me so they aren’t forced to grow against their will.

Why should I apologize for my existence? Why should I cower down so you can feel bloated beside me? Because you are not empowered in this. You are not triumphant in this. You are falsely made to feel as though you have won some battle against me. Yet, I was never fighting you in the first place. I was never out to usurp your imaginary power.

I was simply living. Tasting the moments I was blessed to know. Relishing this harsh reality in any infinitesimal way I was allowed because none of us will be here forever and far too many of us are gone far too soon. Far too many memories are never made because we forget the cruelty of time. We forget we are all small in the scheme of things.

Today I tell you all, I love who I am.

I don’t love every regrettable decision I make. I’m not fond of every misstep I muck my way through. I don’t always cherish the experiences that ensnare my world and leave me feeling helpless.

But I love me.

The child who cowered and prayed to be unseen for far too long. The human who waged wars unlike anyone else ever could on myself in the hopes of defeating my existence. The woman who clawed her way through her own skin until I wore it, truly fucking wore it. This woman. This Fearlessly flawed creature who knows I will only ever be this me Today. I will only ever be this young and naive in this moment. I will only ever know this feeling for as long as I hold my breath around it. I will only ever have this chance to do something worth remembering now.

I’m sorry may slip through my lips from time to time. It will land exactly how I intend it to when I have done wrong. But it will never again be used to make me feel less so another can momentarily feel like more than me.

I am not sorry for this Susie. Never again will she be less than everything she has fought to become.

#sorrynotsorry #SFA #stellar #fierce #astonishing #SouthernFriedAsian

Standard