Hello, Stranger.
I know you care deeply and want everyone to know. You have a voice that must be heard. But if others speak, you fear your voice will be hushed, shushed, or even silenced. The mere thought most likely causes pain deep within your gut.
Let me tell you what to do so your voice can erode all others. Let me walk you through the steps it would take to get exactly what you want.
First, remember every word I say that isn’t about you is a lie. If I speak of me, or those unlike you, it is only to see if you will fail. You must ignore me completely and only worry of you. You must keep yourself front and center and push any who would disagree into the distant past. Do not let me win, not at the beginning, not even a little, and most definitely not in the end.
Let’s try a test of your resolve.
Hello, you.
I am sitting here hoping you will see my words and read them through my voice. I pray you’ll hear my tone, intention, and how softly I speak at you because I added the slightest hint of grace coupled with compassion. I hope you’ll pause, just as I did, and answer me earnestly when I question your comments. I want us to speak together and come to a collaborative conclusion. I want us to unite in reason, compassion, and love for all life.
But I know better than to hope. I know the reality of the online dance we all embark on. I step forward; you push me back; I step to the side, and you jump onto my intended spot. We move awkwardly and out of sync. Never once being in tune.
Then I’ll ask a question or beg to understand your meaning, and no matter how genuine my intention is, you cannot forget that my goal is to erase your voice.
Dear, you.
Did you remember? As I described my dishonest delusions of being, that I’m only here to test you? Don’t let me make you feel for me. Don’t you dare pause or think of me. You must push forward blindly without hesitation, or my wicked words might do their worst. I cannot feel, or dream, or hope. I am not built like you. I am less but a wisp of what you are. You are full, and I am minuscule.
Now, to win, you.
You’ll need to twist and turn my question into an inauthentic probe. How dare I assume I have a right to _____. Whatever you say here it’s all the same. My greedy questions are an affront, an assault. A symbol of my unmerited ways. I don’t ask to know the truth. I ask to expose you. I ask to demonstrate that you are beneath me and must answer me.
Don’t let me try to guide, teach, or show the work I put in. You did more research, better research, deeper research… whatever that word even means these days. You know I don’t understand it. That I don’t know how or where to look, you know I wouldn’t dedicate time to learning or dare crack open a book.
I would say we could agree to disagree, but we both know I would be lying. Agreement was never an option, as we are opposed. Being opposite online means you hate me to my core because my name is an unknown of the many. I am no celebrity, no public figure with millions of mentions, I am a no one bot bopping around with a no one soul. Ignore the possibility that I could be… anyone. I am not. Especially if we have ever met out in the world. Forget my smile and the things we once shared. Forget how I may have held the door for you just a second longer than necessary. The past image of me in your head is a lie. Remember the words of those you’ve never met. The words that you’ve clung to this long. Do not let me pretend to be a person only to steal your safety away.
Call me names. You know the ones. They sit reared and ready to go on your heart.
Tear me down. Show me how little I mean.
Destroy my will to live.
Speak to me in ways you would never to my face. Spew hatred. Spew insults. Spew reckless abandon. Test your best against me. You have the right to because you are real, and I am nothing that can be compared. I am a nothing person with a nothing life, unlucky to still be alive.
Remember, you.
If I make a point that could potentially be valid, redirect the topic to where you prefer it to go. An easy area is to attack my values, morals, and beliefs. Don’t worry, you don’t have to know what they are just assume and apply as you decide. You are in charge. You make our rules. I only wait for you to decide what they should be.
Lucky for you, I am nothing hard or that could need deciphering. So, reduce me down to a simple set of needs, beliefs, and, most importantly, limitations. Tell me I am ignorant of the truth, but never provide any because I should be responsible for ferreting that out anyway. Don’t do the work for me, as I’m lazy enough on my own. Don’t share what you know or don’t know. Never admit that not knowing could be a possibility. You have to know. You always know. You just know. Don’t tempt me to dig or poke or prod your reason. You need not explain yourself to someone like me.
While you’re at it, lump me into a group you loathe and other me as much as possible. This way, you signal to people like you that I should be treated like trash. You’ll let everyone know you are the better of us, having bested the nothing person from the nothing group. Your group will clamor around you and outnumber me. You will win yet again.
True dominance is demonstrated loudly and proudly. It need not be quiet or cunning. It need not sit silently. It should be screamed across screens so it does not dare go ignored.
Now, you.
You should never forget that I cannot be trusted. I might try to wiggle or worm or wedge words in you’ve never considered or even heard. Don’t worry, though. You must remember that you aren’t to debate the words but simply argue against my person. Just stay the course and keep my humanity in question. Writhe away from reason and logic and steer yourself back to strangling out my soul.
By keeping all eyes on how I am inhumane, you will have won yet again. You, the more human hero to my soulless shell of a being.
Your goal isn’t to see me or to have a conversation. Your goal is to show that only your view matters.
Tell the world that there is only one way.
There is only one opinion.
One belief. One life. One right.
Yours.
How to win a Debate: Determine the topic. Research the topic- being sure to look at as many sides as are relevant. Determine the facts that lend to a reasoned argument. Plan for counter arguments. Argue the issue and not the person. End the debate amicably. How to Win a Debate Online You can’t.
This is so true, as soon as somebody disagrees online it can devolve into an ad hominem so quickly. It seems as though we’re in the age where if you disagree with a person they take it as an attack on their identity. It’s like nuance is going out the window and it’s agree with me or you hate me with no in between. Still, I respect people who are able to go back and forth with people like that without being pulled into a mud slinging match. Good read, hope you have a great day